A letter from Minnesota

Dear Steve and Nancy,
I am writing to congratulate you on a brilliant escape. Today's Strib headlines gleefully report the possibility of two feet of snow here on or about Christmas Day. Of course, as usual, they have no idea of what will actually occur, but this prediction will be enough to amp up the traffic and intensity. This specter of frozen isolation will not only strip grocery shelves, but increase the desperation of the Christmas hunting and gathering hordes navigating rutted parking lots.
And there you are on a golf course in Arizona. We now understand the genesis of the term "green with envy."
You're on a roll: you skip a nasty Minnesota October and now you do this. Wow. Consider a brief visit to that casino south of Tucson.
Your sister Sosie has no such luck. And now she's dragging dear Bill into it. Last year's post-Christmas snowstorm marooned Sosie in the Bloomington IKEA, awaiting her return flight to California. It was February before she got her toothbrush back. This year they're scheduled to arrive in Minnesota on Christmas Day, just in time to slip and slide into the pages of history, as part of an all-time record for misery. Florida Virg will host their arrival at his Eden Prairie ice castle. He may be the cheerful one. This is going to look to Sosie and Bill like payback for the blistering heat we got attending their son's wedding last summer.
Meanwhile, our sister Linda is working more logistical issues than an MSP air traffic controller, as she re-plots a Christmas Day driving schedule to include stops to see our mother in Alexandria, her grandchildren in Blaine and the Lutherans of Windom. She will be accompanied in this heroic endeavor by her warrior son. We advise warm blankets, raisins, chocolate bars and a candle.

For our part, we usually stay home and let Christmas come to us. But not this year. For the first Christmas in thirty, we plan an away family gathering -- at Marcy's in Minneapolis, conveniently located mere blocks from the snow-emergency impound lot. It's been the buzz for weeks now, as Marcy shoulders her mother's burden, feverishly preparing for up to a dozen yuletide merry-makers. Yesterday Kathleen delivered a supply of steel folding chairs. That exercise may turn out to be easier than delivering ourselves on the Big Day.
So enjoy your sun-kissed holiday, little brother and sweet sister-in-law. You deserve it.
Here's hoping that your family Christmas guests can break out of town to join you.
Stan

(Images courtesy Teli -Keptik)