Email from the Mall of America. . .

Our relatives went to the Mall of America today, and we are so proud. Here they are dining at "Dick's Last Resort" where apparently the goal is to be more obnoxious than your server. Going there was Jill's idea, the "Retired Pole Dancer" claims. And don't argue the point with Zachary. He "kicked Anorexia's ass. Yay." They're sure to be even more obnoxious by the time they reach Northfield tonight. Oh Goodie.

(Actually, they're quite distant relatives, my friends. We hardly ever see them.)