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If you want to know about horse racing, see Kathleen, a Swede. She took her big brother to the Shakopee track today to view the Preakness and to bet on the live races.
As she left the house, Stan sagely advised her to put money down on Big Brown, because that's Mom's maiden name. All very scientific, don't you know.
Brown won, but of course everybody else bet on that horse too, so it didn't pay out much. $2.40 on a $2 bet. Now Brown is vying for the Triple Crown on June 7.
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(For those of you who don't know, Joe Mauer is the catcher for the Minnesota Twins and won the major league batting title last year. We saw him do it in the metrodome, going 3 for 5 on his final day of the regular season, besting the Yankee contender, Derek Jeter, and somebody else. This singular achievement is all well and good, but Joe is from Kathleen's hometown, which alone had already elevated him to sainthood.)
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Her brother will be eating peanut butter sandwiches all week.